I believe there must come a point in every human life where we decide if we are going to base our core identity and hope on what mere human beings breathe into us or if there is truly something better out there. In my journey, I reached that point during my battle with double brain cancer. It was if reality sarcastically hit me over the head as chemo was being shot through my tattered veins that I could possibly die. When you are faced with any life threatening circumstance, you tend to see life a bit more clearly. I began crying out to God in ways I never thought I would…in ways I never thought I could.
I stopped running and I started listening.
Over the years, I started writing these lessons He has taught me – these words I feel may inspire others regardless of the challenges you face today.
Who Holds Your Value?
The way we see ourselves, through the acceptance or rejection of others is not how God views us.
Let that sink in and take root in your heart dear friends. Your worth is not defined by how others see you, but is only measured by Gods endless love for you – His precious child. I love what God whispered Samuel as he was looking to see who God was preparing to take the throne after Saul:
The LORD doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7 NLT)
God knows us on the deepest level, yet the more we allow ourselves to fall into a closer relationship with Him, the more we learn about who God created us to be. The same Creator that decided how night and day should operate and placed the stars in the sky indeed knows your heart. He sees your joy and feels your hurt. Masks don’t cover up anything from Him. If God already knows your heart, what keeps you from coming to Him?
For me, I knew God saw my anger towards Him (I’m pretty sure we covered that yesterday). I felt if I could simply keep this inside, tightly bottled-up, that somehow it would go away. It wasn’t until a friend approached my hospital room during my battle with cancer that I allowed myself to really put a voice to my anger with God. Even after all of the years of journaling silently, I was challenged to talk out loud to Him. As soon as I had the opportunity when the hospital lights were dimmed that night and my door was shut, I vocally allowed my fears and anger to spill out. Tears were flowing freely that moon-lit night…yet, for the first time in my life I felt a piece of my mask peel away at the same time.
God was okay with me not being okay.
God was welcoming my questions because I was waiting for His answers.
God was listening to my fears because I finally felt safe to come to Him with them open-wide.
I wasn’t quite to the place where I could say I felt God with me that night, yet my heart felt lighter. I felt heard by Him. I felt somewhat free. I felt accepted by Him to just be me.
And friends, that’s exactly where God wants us to be. He wants us to know that He sees our hearts and still wants to love us completely. God wants us, all of ourselves to simply come to Him to be healed from the inside out.
Our disabilities do not define our capability to fully experience God’s heart healing ability.
So, today, let our Abba whisper to you:
My child, I do not see things the way you see them. People judge you by your outward appearance, but I see your heart.” (Based on 1 Samuel 16:7 NLT)
Your turn – If God truly sees all of our heart, what prevents us coming to Him openly? I’d love to hear your words today friends!
Part 3 is up tomorrow!